Saturday, April 5, 2008

Coming out of the Closet




Yes...I am still breast feeding my 18 month old...and for some reason I feel ashamed by it. She only nurses about 1 time a day, and might even go a day without, but she still comes up to me...pulling on my shirt and trying to get to her milk. Today she was trying to nurse while we had some family over and I just looked at her and said "Not now Hailey". As soon as they left I nursed her and she looked so happy...she pulled off and exclaimed "DONE".
It took a long time to establish Hailey at the breast. It was two months of bleeding, scabs, blisters, a lot of cuss words, trips to the lactation nurse and pain meds. If she had been my first I would have for sure stopped; it was that bad. But I knew that if I stuck with it, it would become easier and I would be happy if I did. I joked during that time that if I made it through I would nurse her until she was 2...and it looks like that is where we are heading.
I stopped nursing Ella when she was 11 months. I remember it very clearly because I was pregnant again with Hailey, and was so sick with nausea and vomiting. I was constantly on the edge of serious dehydration and my dr. suggested to me that maybe I should stop nursing Ella. I immediately started to sob. Maybe it was just the pregnancy hormones getting to me, but I wasn't expecting to react like that. Ella was more than ready to be done, but for some reason I wasn't.
The funny thing is, if someone else was telling me they breastfed their baby until he or she was 18 months or even 2 years...I would probably tell them how great that was...and would truly mean it. But for some reason, I don't really want people to know I am still nursing Hailey. At the same time, if she wants it, I am not ready to cut her off. Even though she is becoming more of a big girl everyday, she is still a baby in my eyes...and if she still needs her mommy milk every now and then, I will be happy to give it to her.
I am writing about it today just to get it off my chest (no pun intended!). I feel better about it already. Enjoy the photos of my beautiful 18 month old baby girl :)

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Kelly, how do you think babies survived before bottles, etc. They all probably nursed until at least 3. Now if she comes up and asks ME for mommy milk, you can quit :) (JK) Remember every single time you nurse her, she is getting the best nutrition a little one can get, and nothing can compare to that. And just think there will come a day in the near future when she will say, just like Ella, "Momma you can go inside now". You are doing great!

I love you every day
mom

Wendy West said...

I heard on Doctor Phill today that the World Health Org. actually recomends breastfeeding untill 2 years of age or longer. One of the leading pediatricians says the longer you nurse the smarter your child will be. He also says to pick up on socially awkward cues. Like if your child is throwing their keys on the nightstand and says "Mom I'm thirsty." LOL. Own your decision making.


Breastfeeding is an unequalled way of providing ideal food for the healthy growth and development of infants; it is also an integral part of the reproductive process with important implications for the health of mothers. As a global public health recommendation, infants should be exclusively breastfed(1) for the first six months of life to achieve optimal growth, development and health(2). Thereafter, to meet their evolving nutritional requirements, infants should receive nutritionally adequate and safe complementary foods while breastfeeding continues for up to two years of age or beyond. Exclusive breastfeeding from birth is possible except for a few medical conditions, and unrestricted exclusive breastfeeding results in ample milk production.